Thoughts for Mothers' Day (13 may 12)
You know there are guys who understand women?
This ability has always impressed me, particularly as it seems to be most common in men who are not particularly sharp in other areas.
Well, I've got it figured.
They don't really understand, they just accept. They observe female reactions, and predict that women will tend to follow that pattern.
The trouble with me is, to me, 'understanding' means 'understanding how something works'. In other words, I couldn't just accept the differences between men and women (women are more subtle, etc.). I had to understand WHY and HOW.
Well, now I do. It all follows from a simple principle:
Large mammals have few children. Correction: large FEMALE mammals have few children.
The reason women are more 'picky' than men, the reason you can't say "do you find me attractive, and if so, how about it?", is because genes, in a woman, are looking for a partner who will be good for their children. This is a lot more complicated than good looks. Men, on the other hand, who can have many more children, don't need a partner who will be good for their children. They've nothing to lose by having as many partners as possible.
This explains a lot, ranging from my relative lack of success to the AIDS epidemic.
People are afraid of 'biological determinism', 'reductionism', etc.. But consider - the most profound emotion we know and revere, the maternal instinct, is utterly and completely reducible to biochemistry. Because large female mammals have few children, every one is precious to their genes - the genes which code, via chemicals, for the maternal instinct, are more likely to, duh, have copies of themselves survive.
The human female's 'subtlety' is a simple extension of that instinct.